Here is our monthly edition of our Agony Aunt column, brought to you by our very own Jade Benn. The questions below are a reflection of the most popular issues that you have written in to us about, this months topics are Body Confidence and Contraception.
Please continue to write in to us about anything you wish and we hope to feature your concern in next months segment.
We hope the advice provided is helpful and useful.
Q: I’m 15 years old and I’m worried about my body. In the changing rooms after practice I notice that all the girls have bigger breast than me? I’ve been wearing padded bra’s and trying to stuff socks into my bra’s, but instead of looking voluptuous they tend to look a little deformed which is not attractive. I feel as though they’ve stopped growing, is there a way I can make my small breasts any bigger?
What should I do?
A: Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to make your breasts grow bigger or faster than nature intends. Breast come in all shapes and sizes and that’s normal, no two women’s breast are ever the same. All breast develop at different stages, but usually during puberty at between 8 – 11, or even during mid teens at 13 – 15. Usually a young woman’s breast are fully developed until 17 but they may continue to grow or change throughout adulthood.
So as a young woman you are still naturally developing, not just your breast, but your entire body. I saw a picture on Instagram recently of a slim girl and a thick girl. They were dressed very differently. They had their backs to one another but were peeking over each others shoulders. Above each of there heads where thought bubbles, the thicker girl’s thought bubble said “I wish I was skinny enough to wear that outfit”, whilst the slim girls thought bubble said “I wish I had the curves to wear that dress”.
The overall message in the picture is: love what you have, someone else does. Take your physical development in your stride. Everyone is different and that’s exactly what makes us unique. You will grow and develop and most importantly, discover yourself and your style. You will learn how to rock your frame and work your assets. As you go through life, you will meet people and develop new ideas, and possibly follow different trends that will give you a new appreciation for yourself. Don’t be misled by the media, or succumb to the pressure of peers. Be happy with you and all your body you are beautiful.
Q:Me and my girlfriend are currently having regular sex. For a long time now we’ve been using the withdrawal method but we don’t use condoms. She’s been to get the morning after pill more than once but i’m starting to think this isn’t a good idea.
What do I do ?
A: The withdrawal method is not a reliable form of contraception. Using this method can lead to an unplanned pregnancy. Even before penetrative sex, a liquid called pre-ejaculate – also known as pre-cum – is produced in men. Men have no control over this liquid which contains thousands of sperm, therefore even if he hasn’t fully ejaculated through penetrative sex, there is still a chance of an unplanned pregnancy occurring.
You may not have even had penetrative sex for an unplanned pregnancy to occur, for example sperm can enter into a woman’s vagina through mutual masturbation, this is where both partners may exchange genital fluid through touching or if a male ejaculates near a females vagina or if a male’s erect penis comes into contact with a females vagina. It is important to protect yourself and your partner to avoid this from happening.
You and your girlfriend need to sit down and talk. Acknowledge and clarify what it is that you both want – if that is to mutually avoid a pregnancy – then research and decide on a safe and non-permanent form of contraception. You have to choose what works best for you both. This could be be the the patch, oral contraceptive pill or injection. If you are both concerned about what she’s putting in her body – after all it is ultimately her choice – then you can research the coil, condoms, femidoms or spermicide as non-hormonal options.
The morning after pill , formally known as Emergency Hormonal Contraception, EHC, is usually taken after having unprotected sex. It is for occasional use only and it is not suitable as a regular method of contraception. If it is just the use of the morning after pill that concerns you, you should speak to a health professional at a local GUM clinic, your GP, or even your local pharmacist. They can inform you of any potential risks with frequent usage.